the Definition of Strength

This is not the first time at work that I run into a life-changing individual, a brave soul, an inspiring story that I wish to have engraved into my wall of memories.

I met her here with her 17 year old son. I will call her Mary and her son Dave. It was close to 10pm and most patients had gone to bed as usual. Only a handful of patients were still playing Cribbage in the lounge on the first floor. Mary and I started chatting about Dave. He was diagnosed with a rare, malignant form of melanoma just 2 months ago and needed to be operated on right away. That is what brought Mary and him down in Vancouver from miles away.

What is the definition of strength for you? For me, Mary is what strength is. Two children, Dave and his sister, who is 5 years older. A couple of years ago, a horrifying car accident put Dave's sister in ICU with her life on the line. She was 21. That made me ask myself - what was I doing when I was 21? Finishing school? Spending time with friends and family? Running around complaining about the weather in Vancouver? Half of her body paralyzed and her brain struggling to put the pieces together after the trauma, no one expected her to live. However, her mind was strong and she managed to regain her consciousness and returned home eventually, yet she was no longer the girl she was. She could not care for herself and would not be able to walk ever again. And not too long after Dave was diagnosed with cancer.

Mary - a mother who loves her children the same way our mothers love us. I can not imagine the pain and despair she felt throughout the years. Despite all the stress, she has to stay strong - for herself, for her daughter, her son, and all those who care about them. All because she is needed by her children. And she can not fall.

Sometimes I don't know how much longer I can do this for. Mary said to me quietly, her tears welling up in her eyes. But I look at my children and I just can't stop loving them and can't stop fighting for them. I have to stay strong because they are my babies and they need me.

I put my hand on her knee and squeezed it gently. She let out a smile and nodded slightly. Mary is just one of the million people who are going through rough times. Yet she still has faith and she is still fighting. Then what excuses do many of us have for giving up on our goals and dreams? From working with cancer patients for years I know that strength is in every one of us.

Find it.